I am working these three days,
the cold is at last gone, whoo hoo,
My form is better, probably because the cold has gone,
and the muzziness that goes with a head cold with it.

Contact with himself is at a minimum, and I am hoping to
keep it that way, but things may get a bit sticky over the
next few weeks as I have started legal proceedings for the
separation, now this will not be a surprise to him, as I am
not a underhanded type of person.
I told him at the start of Jan I would be doing this, and again
last week, but I am not sure whether he believed me or not, I guess
he should know me better, I say what I mean and mean what I say.

I am sticking to the mediated agreement, and hoping he does too,
I just want it all to be sorted, no more afraid of the money not
going in, although he has been good, since the last hiccup just before
christmas, its just to protect us, so I can keep the payments on the
mortgage up, without what he gives, I can't manage that on my own,
I wish I could, I would tell him to stuff it, I hate having to
ask him when will he pay, why is he short, blah blah blah.

I think, well I am hoping with the legalities sorted, there
is just the recovery of the loss of our life together.
That I will have to deal with,
although I am getting there with that,
the acceptance of my situtation and him not being who
or what I thought he was, that has come.

Now I guess its just getting over it, and on with life.
Trying not to be bitter, it frightens me to think
I may end up a hard embittered battleaxe, but sometimes
that is how I come across, sometimes that is how I feel!

Now I'm going to work on that aspect, of me, go for
the gentle effect, not really my forte, but I'll give a
go anyway, and we will see. I think I will be grand,
I hope so anyway.